Foolish disasters...

It has happened..your author has become a victim of alcohol related social misdeeds.

It all began with an innocent invitation to partake in a friends birthday celebrations.

"Oh what fun we shall have" I thought as I began to mentally piece together my comfortable yet stylish winter night time outfits, assessing the appropriateness for the venue of choice.

I was seduced by the warm halogen lights in the bottle shop on my way to "pre-drinks", the shiny bottles glistened at me as if they were winking a skanky little nod of approval for my poor taste in beverages.

Upon arrival to pre-drinks I noticed I was already entering that unfamiliar town of the drunkard east donnie. The breaking of an oven door (not by me) only minutes after I had my first slice of pizza secured the tone of the evening on all accounts. So off to the city we trot for a night of "well mannered frivolity"..? Not quite Professor McGonagal, not quite.

How I momentarily relished in being hit on by 4 different strangers. The novelty however soon wore off once and I began to remember why I detested being single back when. Although I will make note that much to my happiness and I'm sure the happiness of females around the world that PICK UP LINES ARE DEAD! woo wooooooo! yeah! Now it appears the common style to just randomly dance up to a girl while making odd tribal grunting noises? I won't lie, at one point I was seriously close to turning around and having a beyonce-esque booty shaking seizure right up on one of them just for shits and giggles...I restrained...bummer though in hindsight, I'm sure it would have been awesome.

So far too many drinks later after a few hours of rekindling old high schools friendships a tad more firmly through the art dancing and butch chanting and cheering for shots I make my way home...via Swan street (alone) via Polly's via taxi ride with three angels.

The true disgrace is yet to come. Mothers day the next morning? "So what?" I think to myself "I'll totally be fine by then!"n

Suffice to say I was not in the slightest bit fine..Sorry for the early morning present Mum..I'm sure it really brightened your day! Amidst a sea of foggy memories of the night before I cling to one in particular which comes attached to the title of "total humiliation" ...but I shall save that conversation for another day!

With a much smaller headache than yesterday I leave you,


Sincerely,

Katherine Elizabeth